Hello Darling One!

In recent conversations with a coaching client, and suddenly seeing myself do something with ease – the need to call out how CHANGE works seemed needed.

So often we take an action for a change that we desire – and are impatient with ourselves for not following through from there on out until we have said desire fulfilled.

“I have a gym membership, but I never go.”

“I know how to cook healthy meals, but I still don’t do it.”

“I bought that mini blender so I can have Bulletproof Coffee on trips, but I’m not using it.”

“I got the book/course for my business, but I have yet to read it.”

What gives?

And what do we usually do in response to said behavior?

I am not the expert on this matter, but I do understand more and more of the process simply from DOING it.

Change takes a LOT of time, attention and effort.

If we’re already in the practice of doing something that’s similar to the thing desired, it’s not such a challenge to substitute B for A.

I had a friend compliment me for following a new workout program to the extent that it changed my body last year.  He applauded me for actually following through, as he remarked that most don’t.

In that situation I didn’t feel the high level praise was as deserved as he thought, because for me exercise is ALREADY happening.  Switching one workout for another was not a Herculean task, but MANY other things have been and are.

Change that involves something QUITE different than what we usually do, OR aims to separate us from something that provides a sense of comfort or connection that no longer serves us is a BIG DEAL.

Period.  Please know that.

So what happens when we aim to do something different?

Nothing!  At first!

Different than with weight loss (read What to Expect When You’re Expecting), but also similar as the fulfillment of the desired action or outcome often does NOT happen immediately.

We try again, and it doesn’t happen.

Again, nothing.

Again, nothing.

Again, and almost…but no.

Again, nope.

Again, and yes!  We did the thing!

Again we try OR we totally abandon said behavior for a time.

Try again, nothing.

Again, and yes!  We do it!

Again, we do it!

Again, whoops!  Nope!

Again, and yes!

Again, and YES!

YES!

YES!

YESSSSSS!

This is how change works!

We swing and miss over and over again until we make contact.  But one of the more important things to know, in my opinion, is that all the swings that happen before we’re even able to bunt the ball HAVE to happen!!

If they don’t we never even make it to securing a hit, let alone hitting a home run.

Most people are way too hard on themselves in general.

We expect big things for ourselves (yay!), but put such extreme expectations around attaining them that it actually hampers the process.

Buying the treadmill and NOT using it is par for the course!

Unless you already use a treadmill on the regular, it is UNREASONABLEto expect yourself to adopt a new lifestyle immediately due to a purchase!

Honestly.

I recently saw me living this out with a book I had purchased MONTHS ago on marketing.  Specifically why things catch on.

This subject is FASCINATING to me!

But I still wasn’t reading the book!!

So what got me to read it?

– First of all SEEING it for months (this piece is so important!!!).

– Recently making a point (nearly on the daily) to remind myself of stuff that I LOVE that undeniably lights me up (which one of those things is human behavior and marketing).

– And then lastly the recognition of feeling less than satisfied and nourished with spending my evening hours on social media.

(Discontent breeds change!!  Use it to your advantage!)

So I had a need, and then all these factors added up to presenting me with a solution  – READ THIS BOOK BEFORE BED vs WASTE TIME ON SOCIAL MEDIA.

Truth is there was a bit of identification wrapped up in there as well,

“Successful people probably don’t spend all their time wasting it.”

= I wish to do something different in order to feel and create a life that is different.

That’s a lot, right??

Yes.  But the book was THE start.

If I hadn’t purchased it, I never would be able to read it currently.

The truth is if all the factors were in place in order for you to do ____, you would already be doing it right now.

So what that belies is that there’s simply more.

If you want that thing, keep refocusing on that thing.

Put it in front of you (honestly).

Connect it with how you want to feel about you.

What does what you’re doing say about you? 

Is that working for you?

If not, know that the route to big and lasting change takes time and requires attention and effort.

It’s not for the faint of heart.

But if what you want matters, if YOU matter (because that’s what that really communicates), then you will keep trying.

And hopefully this post gives a little wiggle room of perspective, and makes a mini mark of compassion on your lens through which you see you and life.

This stuff is a PROCESS, but it can never come to be if we don’t keep revisiting the thing that we want.

Over and over and over and over again, until we have it!

There isn’t another way. 

And if you truly want what you want, there simply isn’t another alternative.

If you are in need of assistance in the realm of weight loss and find THIS type of approach of interest, please check out Fat Burning Mastery to find out more.

 

To getting you clearer on how the being works, and how to make her work for you.

xox, M